A Secured Life

A secured life is being lived slowly.

Life can be boring at times. When what we do become routinary, we tend to find other things to make us busy and more excited. There’s nothing wrong in pursuing learning. But sometimes, in chasing learning we sacrifice the life already ready to ripe. We become insecure of the good harvests we see around us.

When I was in high school, I loved dreaming about documenting other people’s lives. In college, I took journalism to pursue my dream. But before graduation, I decided to work in the humanitarian world. I wanted to give back. I always find it interesting to know and learn from others – mostly from the most ordinary people in the world. I dreamed of becoming a UN Volunteer and go to the scarcest place we could think of. An adventure for me.

However, everything changed when I was in my second job. God still brought me to my first love; the purpose I see myself fulfilling at present. He wanted me to again pursue journalism by giving this verse from Romans 11:29: “for God’s gifts and his call are irrevocable.” I realized a secured life is ready for change.

I accepted God’s call. But there are times I can’t help but feel insecure. The things going around me seem to be moving very slow. Tonight God reminded me that a secured life really works that way. You’ll recognize this and as you do, you’ll understand that there are good reasons.

In a slow life, God wants you to recognize the simplest things and be humble. He wants you to see all that He carves, His patches, and His little strokes. God wants you to acknowledge Him in everything. 

Remember also that things are routinary because you have not seen the best yet. I remember the time I walked home from our office (that’s a two-hour walk!). I enjoyed the walk because I experienced the things I was not able to do while taking a ride. I did not expect there was beauty hidden on my way home.

This is what God wants to remind us about life. We seemed to be walking the same path each day and it’s tiring. But did we already experience the best out of it?

Do not be anxious! Give thanks. Commit everything to Him. Do not be moved. Understand that He’s acting. Know that God cares. Take it slow and be secured.

5 Ways to Happiness

Before, I thought happiness is a choice but eventually I realized it’s a skill. You can’t wake-up in the morning merely saying, ‘I’ll be happy today’. I’m not saying it’s bad, in fact, for me it’s the first step. Being happy is a skill you need to learn. Like any process in life, there is no shortcut. A man wasn't born happy (actually baby cries first during birth, right?J); he needed to learn how to smile, to laugh, and in time make others smile, too.

I remember a friend who asked me how I manage to keep calm and be happy despite the unnecessary circumstance. Straightway I said, ‘I don’t know’, and then I was puzzled. How do I really treat the things that hinder me to be happy? Thanks to that friend because that question brought me to these words now. And this will also serve as a written reminder to me whenever I need to re-learn happiness. Also, I want to help that friend by sharing these answers to his question.

On my part, here’s the five ways I consider to maintain my handsome-ness (I mean my happiness J). But you know what, being joyful really helps you to be the you-don’t-look-your-age guy or gal. At least, these ways work for my case and I discovered these entirely on my own experience. Probably, these will thoroughly help you or these will (in some point) help you ponder on your own ways to happiness. By the way, since these also serve as a reminder to me, allow me to speak in second person without making an impression that I’m the Mr. I-Know-Everything.

PLAY WITH NUMBERS. Know your priorities; who or what to be the first and the last. In my case, my priorities are these: (i) God; (ii) Family; (iii) Work/Career and; (iv) Friends. I see these categories never to be changed or added my entire life though I still don’t have a girlfriend because I know eventually she’ll fall on family.J Your priority list needs to be firm that way. Because if not, you’ll only get frustrated why everything doesn’t work good. Just like in organizing, planning should always come first. Who’s the planner in the first place? Isn’t it God? I hope your first priority is Him alone also.

When you know who or what to choose, you’ll always make the right decision. This always happen to me and I know to you, too. Aside from the fact that this way always whispers you the right choice, it is also a good time-saver. You’ll realize when you know your priorities that you are not wasting a moment. Let’s go back in planning -- you can’t implement something when it is not planned; you’ll only waste time and resources. Lastly, playing with numbers keeps good relationships. They said the secret to a happy relationship is time. And you can’t give time to someone if you don’t know when to give it to them. You can’t give ENOUGH time to something or someone when you are juggling things or (I hope not) people.

USE YOUR OWN SHOES. Be unique! You don’t need to fit in someone else’s shoes. We are born with different talents, skills, likes, and passion. What makes you happy may be or may not be the things that make others happy; chances are those things make them sad. When you know what shoes fit you, you’ll not be tempted to try other people’s footwear -- you’ll not get insecure.  You’ll see yourself fighting and fulfilled. Find your niche and sing your song!

The horizon is wide and dreams are given to each and every one. It’s more rewarding to tick in your own boxes of goals in life. No one can erase and change the purpose God has painted in your life EXCEPT Him alone. People that surround you may say otherwise or your environment is building an unending blocks but never give-up. And keep moving! Because may be yes you are wearing your own shoes, but you are not using it. If you know you’re good at something, work out to be better. Never get tired to learn from your mistakes. Aim for the best. Embrace success!

LAUGH ALONE. If you’re alone in an island and all the resources you need to survive for one year are there, will you LIVE? Life isn’t a survival quest; rather, it’s a living game. You need your family and friends, but accept the fact that there will come a day you’ll live alone (hugging just your pillow, listening only to your MP3, and talking to yourself). When that day comes, you need to laugh alone; you need to learn to find happiness on your own.

I am not saying you fake your smiles or you make fool of yourself. Rather, learn to be independent! Smile a real smile or laugh a loud laugh though nobody’s around. I think this will work when you know who you are and you are living the life you want to live. When you are on that island, will you take the risk to discover something? That might be a new game out of shells; new species of birds; new ways to build fire; or new constellation of stars. How you could do that, I don’t know, too. But isn’t that fun and exciting? And last question, when you are in that island alone, will you still praise God? How will you talk to Him? Thank Him or ask several questions?

GET RICH. I know wealth will lead you to happiness -- to limited or to unending one. I want the latter but I am not talking of money here. Precious things on earth are more than just that. I am talking about getting rich in relationship. Live more for more friends, relatives, teachers, and buddies!

Last month I wrote about the Influential People in my life. These people are just some of my richness. As I have said, choose an unending wealth. Befriend the right people! These people accept who you are and do not coerce you to change to fit in the clique. And eventually, these are the people who will tell you bluntly the things you need to change.  They will help you to become better.

SWALLOW GIANTS. Make the impossible! Who can tell what are the impossible in this world anyway? If God says you to do this, never think-twice. Even though that is to walk from east to west.

For me the first step to trusting God is to dream big. When you have dreams in life, you have goals and you know where you want to go. It’s never easy to get to your destination. However, instead of taking it as a hard task, take it as a challenging course. When you have dreams, you are living. And when you are already there, give all the glory back to God.

There you have it! LIVE LIFE! THRIVE! 

Part I: The Perfect Place (At Work)

Photo by: Google

If you are searching for a perfect place, I tell you, you’ll fail. But if you are creating one, be thrilled to experience success. I could say this confidently because I consider this as the biggest learning I acquired for the past 20 months that I've been working. This learning isn't a big deal for some but for a neo-fight like me, it’s an oasis in the middle of a scorching hot desert -- the idealistic thirst you've been experiencing after graduation was alleviated by the iced water unexpectedly showered to your head.

Well this learning doesn't work just in the workplace. Eventually, I see changes in different aspects of my life when I applied this. Now, let me share them and I hope you don’t mind wandering inside my story. Dissecting how this ‘perfect place’ learning has helped me in different ways I know would benefit in appreciating God’s ways better. Before I am looking for one perfect place but now, I've created different perfect places more flawless than I imagined.

At Work

The last semester in college was both a cramming-to-pass and a job-hunting season for me. My goal then was to work here in Manila using my college diploma -- in short I aimed to be a writer, a documentarist, a researcher, or a broadcaster; anything inline with my degree. Before graduation came, I received a lot of phone calls and job interview schedules. And to cut the story short, I got my first job in less than 3 weeks after ending my college life; as a Communication Research Associate in Agora Business Intelligence in one of the most prestigious business districts in Metro Manila, THE Makati City.

Precisely how I described it was how I felt when I first grasp independence and adventure. I was more than thrilled to leave home than to hold my diploma. I assumed I found the perfect workplace. But after a month my heaven became hell. I realized (simultaneously) watching six news channels everyday, reading five newspapers in the morning, and writing less than 10 news articles before the day ends (not to mention the low compensation) would make you stop when the traffic light is red and would make you go when it’s green. Really, I experienced that kind of shattered well-being. But obviously I’m still here and to clear things out I was not in an accident.

So I just waited to get my supposed-to-be regularization and left Agora after three months. Then I entered Children’s Hour Philippines, Inc. as a Marketing Communications Associate slash Friends-Raising Associate; in short as a social worker for marginalized children. I know this is far from journalism but as I explained from my previous articles, this is where my heart is. I was also a sponsored child before and I want to give back and I really love kids.

I’m working with Children’s Hour for one year & four months now and I shall say it’s not the perfect workplace either. But here I learned to make one. Despite the difficult superior I had who disclosed during his despedida (yes, thanks God he’s not with us anymore) that he planned to not regularize me because I did not grow and not yet ready, I’m still here confident that I’m working only for God and for the children. I don’t know why he said that when my colleagues and boss said otherwise. May be if I did not learn to turn around agony, I might be in my third employer or may be fourth; continuing the unending search for perfection.

I am not saying that you take in all the trash talks in your office or tolerate your inhumane boss just to put a big amount in your accounts. If you’re not growing and everything in your job contradicts your principles, then you’ll never create a perfect place (because you need to mold a good employer first which will never happen). In my case, I first considered my passion which I will discuss on the part three and consulted God of course.

In my adjustment stage in my second job, I first acknowledged all the imperfections of my employer, my colleagues, and even the struggles I need to face everyday going to the office. And I didn't stop. I did my best to put them at my back and never in front of me and that’s how I moved forward. If I will just focus on what my superior said during his despedida, I would have treated myself as the tiniest piece in the office -- contributing less, making it hard for everyone, and is just surviving because of my colleagues’ pity.

But I humbled myself. I did not think of revenge because I know eventually that would make me loose. I taught of my purpose and what God has told me. I worked hard to let my boss see again the first thing that she saw in me when she decided to hire me. I focused on the perfect smiles I see on the children’s faces; the most soothing ‘thanks’ you’ll hear from different people; and the warmest hug you’ll feel from a cancer survivor.

May be you’ll say you’re in a different situation now. Fulfillment in an NGO world is different from the corporate. But think of what made you decide to be in that place. I hope it’s out of passion either to build establishments as an engineer, to heal patients as a doctor, or even to make everyone smile as a clown. We are all different in terms of what makes us happy. And where we found happiness there we can create perfection.